But in the real world, especially in the open water swimming world, there are real heroes and heroines who display their talents both on land and in the water. These are men and women who literally play with jellyfish as Pádraig Mallon did out in the ocean [see above].
What can they do? What would they do in the Dos Equis advertising campaign?
Here is our guess:
Dolphins ask to draft off them… Sharks worry about them… Their Speedos are considered to be a small watercraft… Michael Phelps thinks about retirement when they start to swim butterfly… Their kick is measured in horsepower… They can break open coconuts with their bare hands… Their wake is the size of 6-foot waves… They munch on jellyfish when they are stung… The word hypothermia is not in their dictionary… Their sunscreen stays on 3 days in the water… They don’t need a tow-in when swimming in big wave surf spots… Their goggles can withstand the pressure of the Mariana Trench… Their ice swims are not considered extreme… They consider a crossing of the English Channel to be simply a good warm-up… They kayak with their bare hands… They’ve got gills… They can breach completely out of the water when they eggbeater… They can swallow gel packs whole during their feedings… Portuguese call them men o war… Their marathon swims are measured in days… They do flip turns on rock jetties… They never need GPS… Their blood has a hint of seaweed… Their tears are made of salt water… Mermaids flock to the shore when they near the water… They call the Oceans Seven home…
…they are among the most interesting men in the open water swimming world and are real-life heroes not unlike Jonathan Goldsmith seen below.
Southern California native, born 1962, is the creator of the WOWSA Awards, Oceans Seven, Openwaterpedia, Citrus Corps, World Open Water Swimming Association, Daily News of Open Water Swimming, Global Open Water Swimming Conference. He is Chief Executive Officer of KAATSU Global and KAATSU Research Institute. Inductee in the International Marathon Swimming Hall of Fame (Honor Swimmer, Class of 2001) and Ice Swimming Hall of Fame (Honor Contributor - Media, Class of 2019), recipient of the International Swimming Hall of Fame's Poseidon Award (2016), International Swimming Hall of Fame's Irving Davids-Captain Roger Wheeler Memorial Award (2010), USA Swimming's Glen S. Hummer Award (2007, 2010) and Harvard University's John B. Imrie Award (1984). Served on the FINA Technical Open Water Swimming Committee and as Technical Delegate with the 2011 Special Olympics World Summer Games, and 9-time USA Swimming coaching staff.