Things Open Water Swimming Never Say

Things Open Water Swimming Never Say

Courtesy of WOWSA, Huntington Beach, California.

That was easy.
I don’t need my goggles.
I’m not hungry after that long workout.
Those stings don’t bother me.
I love my goggle tan.
Getting lanolin on my clothes doesn’t bother me.
My wife/husband doesn’t mind sand all over the car.
I never tie my suit.
I only need one ear plug.
That was way too easy.
When I stepped on the sea urchin, I kept on walking.
I’m never nervous around sharks.
Running in soft sand is the easy part.
I’d rather spend all my time doing dryland [training].
I swim better with jet lag.
I love the smell of neoprene.
I can see better at night.
When he elbowed me, I thought nothing of it.
I never need a warm-up.
It’s 20% mental.
I’ll just wing it.
Put some Vaseline on those goggles.
Everything always goes to plan.
Where are my wetsuit booties and gloves?
I love breathing in the [boat] exhaust.
I prefer swimming through the kelp beds.
I can’t stand swimming in that crystal-clear water.
I got shin splits from swimming too far.
I’ll swim breaststroke the whole way.*
I’ll swim backstroke the whole way.**
I’ll swim butterfly the whole way.***

I didn’t mind swallowing all that water.

* not including Jason Lassen, Matthew Webb, Paul Oudendijk, Chris Partington, Ian Wallace, Asya Cautela, Grazia De Gregorio, Graham Barratt, Alexandr Brylin, Thomas Burgess, Frederik Jaques, Alan Morrison, and Tony Bailey.

** not including Tina Neill, Hamish Osborne, James Christie, Giovanni Arrabito, and Ettore Mercuri.

*** not including Julie Bradshaw, James di Donato, Jonathon di Donato, Héctor Ramírez Ballesteros, Natalie Lambert, Dan Projansky, Sylvain Estadieu, Gianni Golini, Graham Barratt, Charles Tupitza, Francesca Mazari, Larry Paulson, Vicki Keith, Kathryn Mason, Robin Lajoie, Brian Suddeth, Brenton Williams, and Philip Martin.

Photo shows Lewis Pugh who has been never heard to say, “The water is too cold.”

Copyright © 2015 by World Open Water Swimming Association